Complications
by Beena-Pani
Summary: Peaches and onions for all! Kate and Sam are sent into the present day. Detailed summary inside.
1. Prologue

Complications 

****

By: Beena-Pani

**Disclaimer**: I don't own Sam or Kate. I don't own any other characters. I don't own Green Lake, Texas. I don't own the poem, _Annabel Lee_ by Edgar Allan Poe. (That's the one in the movie, by the way. I'm not creative enough to find another poem.) I'm pretty sure all I own is the plot, though time travel isn't the most original idea out there, is it?

**Rating:** G

**Pairing:** Sam/Kate, what else?

**Category:** Humour/Romance

**Summary:** Both Onion Sam and Miss Katherine knew there could be no happy ending. But, in a deep despair after Sam dies, Kate wishes with all her heart that he would come back and they could go some place where they could have that happy ending that was so far out of reach. She just never realized how boring that happy ending would seem in the 21st century.

~*~

**Prologue**

When Katherine Barlow's sobs had subsided a little, she managed to take a bite of an onion, savouring its taste. The flavour on her taste buds reminded her of _him_. Now, that was all there was left of him.

            She felt her breath become short, and the onion dropped from her hand as a new wave of tears washed over her. Finally, when it seemed as though she had dried up her supply of tears, she lay down on her bed and closed her eyes, trying to get to sleep. Her eyes struggled, trying to open again, but she kept them firmly closed, even if she couldn't get to sleep. She didn't want to know what would happen tomorrow, or the next day, or the next. She didn't even want to _think_ about it. The sound of Trout's motorboat still burned itself into her mind, and the darkness that had surrounded her when she closed her eyes reminded her of the ugly black smoke.

            Katherine tried to remember better things, like how warm and strong Sam's hand had felt as he held onto hers. The way he rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. One of the poems he had recited to her came flooding back into her memory.

            "It was many and many a year ago.  
In a kingdom by the sea  
That a maiden there lived whom you may know  
By the name of Annabel Lee;-  
And this maiden she lived with no other thought  
Than to love and be loved by me.  
  
_She_ was a child and _I_ was a child,  
In this kingdom by the sea,  
But we loved with a love that was more than love-  
I and my Annabel Lee..." She sighed.  "Oh, Sam, how I wish you were here now. How I wish we could go far away from here, where we would never have to hide." As she realized what she had said, she had to laugh grimly at herself. Did she actually think that wish was going to be granted?

            _You're a fool_, she thought angrily. _He will never come back._ With these words, she felt the despair around her deepen.

            At long last, she fell into a dreamless sleep. As she slept, the scenery around her changed. When Katherine awoke, she looked around for about ten seconds, trying to figure out what was best to do.

            Then she screamed.


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I didn't create Sam, Kate, or Mary Lou. However, all the strange stuff in this chapter belongs to ME!

~*~

Chapter One 

The first thing Sam saw noticed was how purple everything was. The walls, the floor, the _air_ even seemed to have a violet tint to it. Then he smelled onions. Now _that_ was unexpected.

          He looked around and realized he was sitting in a chair of some sort. All right, it was a very normal chair, only it was purple.

          Just like everything else.

          Wherever he was, the owners must have been rich to make everything such a colour! Sam looked left and right a second time and noticed a desk with a nameplate on it. He had never learned to read, but he had never seen an information desk, either, so he had no reason not to go up there and ask for help.

          "Uh... Hello?" he said to the man sitting behind the desk. He was wearing the strangest clothes, almost like robes. And they were purple.

          "Name?" asked the man in a bored tone. As Sam got a closer look, he noticed the man had wings, like those of an insect. They were buzzing rapidly; so they were hard to see, save for a greenish blur in the air behind him.

          "Me?" asked Sam, wanting to be sure. The man looked up at him and stopped vibrating his wings. He raised his eyebrows and cocked his head to the side, making his eyes wide.

          "Yes. You."

          "Er... Sa—"

          "Oh. You." The man sighed, his wings beating rapidly again. "You'd better go see Letuphoya." Sam arched a brow at this strange name, but looked to where the man was pointing. There was a door, a lighter shade of purple than the rest of the room. Sam looked over his shoulder, where many other people and animals he hadn't noticed before were sitting. Then he looked back at the door. He looked back once again for reassurance (though he found none) and walked to the door. He turned the doorknob, stepped inside, and was shocked by what he saw.

          A woman sat on a bright green chair, one leg crossed over the other. The rest of the room, too, was a luminous emerald hue that caused Sam to shield his eyes with one hand. He suddenly felt very dull, standing there in plain colours, while the room simply glowed. This was not what had shocked him, though. The woman had milky white skin and, amazingly enough, green hair. As he marvelled at how strange her hair colour was, he also took in her outfit, which consisted of a shirt that seemed much too long (it almost reached her knees) tight pants (which, too, surprised him, as she was most definitely a woman), and a long scarf trailing over her shoulders, wrapped around his neck. Had he been a Bollywood fanatic, he would have recognised that it quite resembled a dupatta, the long scarf that completes a sari. In fact, had he been a Bollywood fanatic, he would have realised that her entire outfit was practically a sari. But, as it was, Sam had never heard of Bollywood, let alone knew what a sari was.

          "You're finally here!" cried the woman, who Sam had now guessed was Leto... Letafo... Well, whatever her name was.

          "So it would seem," he said simply. There was a silence, and then he just went ahead and asked, "Could you explain just what is going on?"

          "Oh, of course! I'm Letuphoya, goddess of death, but my specialty is reincarnation," she said simply, as though she was explaining that one plus one equals two to a five-year-old. "That's because the Underworld is already crammed full of... well, dead people." She smiled sadly and heaved a sigh. "Just yesterday, one guy had a breakdown because he's claustrophobic."

          "Of course," said Sam, acting as though he knew what that meant. Letuphoya got up from her chair and waved her hand in midair, conjuring up another and indicating for Sam to sit down.

          "You seem surprised. Though, I shouldn't expect anything different. Basically, reincarnation means coming back to life after you die. Now, you sold onions, did you not?"

          "Well, yes, I did," he said, trying to look calm. He had known he would die a few moments before it happened, so that wasn't much of a shock, but he had never imagined in his wildest dream that he would be greeted by a man with wings and a woman who claimed to be the goddess of death.

          "So, before you get reincarnated, you'll get two wishes. Gina thinks onions are the second-most magical vegetable. The first are aubergines, of course, what with her name being Aubergina and all." She gave a little smile at Sam's confused look. "Aubergina is the creator of the Universe, and she has a bit of an obsession with aubergines. And onions. She likes to use them as air-freshener. Any creature who promotes either onions or aubergines gets two wishes and the choice of just where you start your new life."

          "Oh," said Sam.

          "You're surprised, but you're not the first," said Letuphoya, looking down at her lap. She looked up again and smiled. "You're wondering if your religion is all a big lie, right?"

          "Not really."

          "Well, I suppose you are now, but it isn't. Every bit of every religion and mythology is true, from Radha being the reincarnation of Laksmi to the world being formed on the shell of a giant turtle. I'm not exactly sure how it all works out, but it does, and we won't question that. Some gods and goddesses, like me, simply aren't popular, so no one thinks we exist."

          "I see," said Sam, but he still wasn't that concerned about that. He was simply surprised, and had every right to be. Suddenly, he thought of Mary Lou. He wondered for a second why he had forgotten so completely about everything in his life, but quickly shrugged that off and the amazement was replaced by worry for is donkey. "Where is Mary Lou? Is she all right? They didn't hurt her, did they?"

          "The donkey? She was asking for you."

          "She's... dead?"

          "Yeah, Sam, but she's been through it before. That was her... let me see... fifth life. She'll be going back as a squirrel pretty soon."

          "Could I see her?"

          "Sure, I don't see why not." Letuphoya got up and walked to the door. She opened it and walked into the room where Sam had been sitting. When he had looked back at who was sitting in the other chairs beside him, Sam hadn't noticed a donkey sitting on the floor with a young horse, playing some sort of game with three rocks. Maybe she had been there the whole time and hadn't noticed him as he hadn't noticed her.

          "Mary Lou?" he asked, and as the donkey turned to him, she let out a hee-haw of delight. She said something to the horse, who nodded and gathered up the stones and walked away. Mary Lou trotted up to Sam at a speed that he had never seen her attempt before.

          "Pup! How are you, my friend? She had a strange, sort of raspy voice, but, other than that, she was speaking perfect English.

          "Mary Lou?" he repeated, his jaw dropping. "B-b-but... you can't speak!"

          "Mule dung! Of course I can, dear!" She let out what he thought was a chuckle. "All creatures, except for humans, of course, can speak many languages. I just happened to pick up some English! As you can see, it was very useful!"

          "Well, are you... Are you okay? They killed you, Mary Lou," He wrapped his arms around her neck in a tight hug. "I'm sorry."

          "Now, no need to be sorry, my dear. It's not the first time I've died!" the donkey said simply, laughing.

          "But, oh, Mary Lou, they _killed_ you. You didn't just _die_. There's a difference."

          "It was quick, Pup, it wasn't as though it was slow or painful. Don't you worry about it now! Really, I'm fine now. I was more worried about you..."

          "Well, I was killed, too," said Sam, the words feeling awkward. He wasn't used to talking about his death after it happened. "But I was the one who broke the law. They didn't have to do anything to you."

          "Well, if they didn't, I'd never get to see you. Besides," Mary Lou smiled a donkey-smile. "

Being a donkey can be a fair bit tiring."

          "Really?"

          "Well, now, I get to start over as a squirrel. That has always been a high priority of mine, Pup, dear."

          "Oh, right. Uh... Mary Lou, why are you calling me 'Pup'?"

          The donkey laughed. "You were ever acting like a young puppy, so playful and sweet, forever chasing something." She got a mischievous look in her eye. "Like Puss."

          "Puss?"

          "Yes, the one with the fair mane and face," said Mary Lou. Sam guessed she was talking about Katherine. He wondered if she, too, had died and was here. But he couldn't look for her now; it wouldn't be polite. "You always were mad about her, you know, Pup. And just like a pup and puss, everyone thought you did not belong together, but you were more than perfect for each other." She shook her head sadly, but it quickly turned into a way of getting her mane under control. 

          "Mary Lou," he said quietly. Mary Lou looked up. "Where's Kather— I mean, Puss."

          Mary Lou's face fell. She pawed the ground and looked sad once again. "Dear Pup, I don't know. I do believe she survived, though. I overheard someone saying it was not breaking any law if she was to kiss you."

          "Oh."

          "I suppose you could always ask, now couldn't you, Pup? You do that. I have to be going now, dear, but we will meet again." Mary Lou didn't said it as though it was a command and not a wish. She stamped her hoof, quickly touched her nose to the floor, and then shook her head from side to side. And then she walked away, down a corridor, and into one of the many rooms. Sam watched as she went.

          "What's wrong?" said Letuphoya, and Sam suddenly remembered she was there.

          "Well," he said, trying to think of something to say. He thought of what Mary Lou had said.

          Letuphoya seemed to read his thoughts, something he wouldn't have put past her, her being a goddess and all. But there was also the fact that she had been standing not too far away from him throughout the whole conversation. "Want to use that first wish?" she asked. Sam looked at her, puzzled.

          "You get two wishes for encouraging others to eat onions, remember?"

          "Oh, but I'm not sure you could help me. I mean, isn't it wrong, what we did? Shouldn't I be punished for that? That's what I'd always thought."

          "Nah, we're all fine with that sort of stuff here. Trust me, you're not the first to die for having a different skin colour. I've been reincarnating guys like you for years."

          "Oh."

          "Come on," she got up and walked to the door, past the information desk, turned left, went down a corridor, and stopped in front of another door. She gestured to the words on the door and read aloud,

          "Seeing Portals." The goddess opened the door and ushered him inside. In the room were what you would recognise as a flushing toilet, but, just as Sam had no clue what a sari was, he had never seen such a thing in his life, and so was not disgusted by the fact that the other three people already occupying the room were staring down into the bowl's depths.

          "Here," said Letuphoya, indicating one of the toilets. Sam walked over to it, and she continued. "This is a seeing portal. It lets you see into the world of the living. Just say the name of who- or whatever you want to see, think of it, push this lever and it will appear in the water. When you're done, just push the lever again." She smiled and Sam came closer to the toilet as she backed away. Feeling very foolish, he put his hand on the lever and said,

          "Katherine Barlow," He squeezed his eyes shut and thought of her, the setting sun hitting her at jut the right angle, so she looked as though she was glowing. His hand pushed down on the lever and he heard a whooshing sound, making his eyes snap open because he was sure the water was going to pour down on him. But instead, he realized as he peered into the toilet's bowl, the water in the portal had swirled and an image appeared on its surface. He saw Miss Katherine, sobbing on her bed, and he felt his heart beat faster. This surprised him, because, of course, he was dead, but it beat faster all the same.

          "Oh, Sam," she whispered, "How I wish you were here now." She sniffed, wiping away her tears. "How I wish we could go far away from here, where we would never have to hide." She was silent, and then she laughed grimly. Sam sighed and, blinking back tears as he now realized just how much he missed her, shoved the lever down forcefully, turning away from the swirling image in the toilet bowl. He gave another great sigh, but suddenly his face brightened. He rushed to Letuphoya and said shakily,

          "I get another wish, don't I?"

          The goddess nodded.

          "So then... Could Katherine and I... Could we, perhaps, go somewhere where we'd be safe?" He highly doubted such a place existed, but the goddess of death raised her eyebrows and asked if that was all.

          "Well, yes," he said. Letuphoya shrugged and muttered an, "okay". She led him back to her office, where they sat down again in the green chairs. She waved her hand in the air, summoned a large binder, and set to work flipping through it.

          "Ah," said she, pausing and pointing at one page with the index finger on her right hand. "The year 2003. You'll be in North America, but far away from Green Lake. It wouldn't be too pleasant to end up there, with what's happened to it. It hasn't rained since they killed you and, well... Not a very pleasant place, indeed." She looked up and continued to explain. "Now, you won't have any memories of this, so you'll have to figure out why you died in the late 1800s and woke up more than one hundred years later. Understand?"

          "Yes, but," he said. "Why won't I have any memories of this?"

          "It's best if people _don't_ find out about the gods and such," said Letuphoya. "You'll attract a lot of attention to yourself saying you died a century ago, true, but no one's going to guess that the Universe was created by an eggplant-obsessed goddess who had eaten too much sugar at the time."

          "Oh, right." Sam really didn't want to get the details on that little incident.

          "You'd better get going," said Letuphoya. "I'll get Katherine there. You go down the hallway and through the third room on your right."

          "All right."

          "Hopefully, I won't be seeing you too soon, Sam," said Letuphoya as he left her office. As he turned down the hall he had gone through before and that Mary Lou had walked down before that, he figured out that she was actually being polite.


	3. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** Don't own Holes. I don't own A Series of Unfortunate Events, either, as they belong to Lemony Snicket.

**Author's Note:** Also, this is taking place in Canada. I'm not overly patriotic or anything, I simply know it better. It stresses me out to write about the States, because I've never lived there. Sorry.

**Thank Yous:** Thanks to Ritty, Celestra, siriusblack101, peachesmooncatgirl563, FinalFantasyLykr, GriffinFox, and Cake Eater for reviewing the story and making me feel special!

**Chapter Two**

Katherine screamed.

            There was a chorus of 'shhh's, and Katherine thought for a moment that it was just the wind. Then she looked around, and held back another scream. She was in a building, and she could see the sun pouring through the window, but, for some reason, it was perfectly cool inside. There were shelves upon shelves of books, and it only took the schoolteacher a few minutes to understand that she was inside a library. An odd library, that was true (there was something very odd about it, something very wrong), but a library all the same.

            But Green Lake didn't _have_ a library.

            Katherine pinched her arm to see if she was dreaming.

            Oh. Well. Maybe Green Lake _did_ have a library, but she just never realized it. Yes, it was a rather silly explanation, but nothing made much sense. Why was the building so cool on sunny day, while, judging by what the men she could see out the window were wearing, it was obviously warm?

            Wait. Those were women. With short hair and _trousers_? There was something very wrong with this world. Only Kate was sure that it was _her_ world that had something very wrong with it.

            "Hey, are you listening?" asked a girl with red hair in such an odd style— what looked like a hundred plaits hung from her head. Katherine was sure she was much shorter than the girl, though she had been one of the tallest women she knew before she went to sleep last night and this girl was obviously very young. Katherine wondered if everyone was taller here.

            "Can you be quiet?" She rolled her eyes as Katherine looked around and nodded. The girl looked down at the book she was holding in her hands (_A Series of Unfortunate Events_, written by someone named Lemony Snicket. This was very odd indeed.), but Miss Katherine continued speaking with her.

            "Oh," said she, taking in this girl's attire as she paused for breath. She, too, was wearing pants! And the shirt she was wearing seemed to be much too small. A little bit of her stomach was exposed and the word 'Angel' was written across her chest in glittery, white letters. Why on Earth would someone write something on their shirt? It was as though the girl had been trying to draw attention to her chest! "I'm a little confused. Could you tell me, am I in Green Lake, Texas?"

            She raised her eyebrows, and then she smiled. "Oh, I get it!" she grinned. "You're Kissin' Kate Barlow, right? From _Holes_! I saw that movie. I'm reading the book now. For school."

            "Well," Katherine paused. She didn't want to tell anyone who she was; in case they figured out she had kissed Sam. But then she remembered— Sam was already dead. But, still, it wouldn't be wise to tell every stranger who asked what her name was. Then again, the girl had said her name as though it was a good thing. Perhaps this was that 'far away from here, where we would never have to hide'. Maybe she was some sort of hero here! Of course, the girl had called her _Kissin' Kate_ Barlow. She may very well have been talking about someone else. But Katherine decided that it could not hurt. Perhaps this girl could give her some helpful information. "I am Katherine Barlow. I don't believe I have been called 'Kissin' Kate' before, though." Katherine didn't want to lie to this girl.

            "Wow, you're pretty convincing!" said the girl. Katherine stared at her. Pretty convincing? Did the girl not think she was being truthful? But why would she be laughing then?

            "I'm being perfectly serious, Miss," She was confused, but the feeling was obviously mutual.

            "Uh... right." The girl raised her eyebrows and, stifling a giggle, rushed over to a group of other girls, dressed similarly, and whispered something to them. They all broke out in quiet laughter, sneaking glances at Katherine, who had realized she was no longer on planet Earth.

            And with that, she passed out.

            "Hey, wake up!" said a voice, quietly but firmly. Someone was shaking her rather roughly. Katherine opened one eye and then the other, taking in the scenery one step at a time.

            She felt light-headed as she remembered the events of the past few minutes and tried to sit up, only getting success when the owner of the voice she had heard before helped her.

            "Are you okay?" asked a young boy. He, too, was wearing strange clothes, but not as strange as the girl's. Wire-frame glasses sat in front of dark, chocolate brown eyes. Katherine's breath caught in her chest and she flung her arms around the boy.

            "Sam," she sobbed, hugging him tighter.

            Meanwhile, a certain onion picker was very confused. Hadn't he just died? Was this some sort of afterlife? If it was, it was a pretty frightening one. Things that looked a bit similar to carriages in that they seemed to be transporting people zoomed by on roads that seemed to be made of perfectly flat and black rock. From some of them came pulsing, deafening sounds that were some sort of music, he guessed. The air smelled, looked and even tasted foul. But this was not what shocked Sam the most.

            The people walking past him, the polite ones trying not to stare at his clothing, were of almost every ethnicity he could think of. Skin colour varied from black to white and there were so many shades of brown! People from every corner of the Earth were walking by each other without giving it a second thought. And then, when he thought he had gotten over his surprise, he saw a young couple kissing, out in the open. At first, Sam had thought they were eating each other. At the same time, he noticed something else: the amazing difference in their skin colour. Walking past each other was one thing, but _kissing_? Why wasn't this upsetting anyone?

            The girl was black and the boy was Asian. They broke apart from each other and smiled. The boy took the girl's hand and dragged his fingers along her palm as they walked in different directions. Finally, they broke apart and turned away from each other. Sam stared as the girl walked past him, seemingly careless.

            A woman walked past him wearing a strange outfit that seemed oddly familiar to him. It consisted of a short top, a long skirt, and a piece of material wrapped around her waist and over her shoulder. Who did he know who wore that? Their name started with an 'L'. Was it Laura? Lee? Letum?

            Letum? Didn't he mean Letuphoya?

            Wait...

            What's a Letum?

            Sam's eyes widened in surprise as the memories came flooding back.

            Letuphoya cursed silently. But in the screwed-up afterlife she worked in, 'silently' meant 'loudly' and 'dogs' meant 'cheese'. So, to make it clearer, the goddess of death and reincarnation let out a string of PG-13 language in several languages.

            Why was it always the huge rules she ended up breaking? The little itty bitty ones were always looked after, but never the 'keep this in mind at all times unless you wish to get fired' types.

            If ever you were going to reincarnate a human, there were a few things to keep in mind. First, find an available time and place, preferably one the human in question did not inhabit in its past life. Second, make sure all the Funnels (other than the one catching the life-draft you need) are clear before proceeding to erase the human's memory. Thirdly, do not open any of the Funnels until the human has made it to the end of the Funnel and is being carried by the life-draft. So, she'd gotten steps one, three, and half of two pretty good, but there was one thing she had forgotten: to erase his memory.

            To fully understand Letuphoya's mistake, one must first understand the science of reincarnation. Funnels are long hallways that are smaller at the beginning, and widen as you walk down them until the floor, walls, and ceiling disappear altogether. Before the end of a Funnel, there should always be a life-draft, a whisper of the life one is about to take on. They are warm and strong, and carry a natural anesthetic that aid them in carrying a being to the next life. The anesthetic calms most animals' minds, so that if they call up memories of the Afterlife, they won't have a fit. There is only one exception: the human mind, though it often rejects anything it doesn't find logical, needs to be cleansed of memories before entering another life. It is in human nature to be selfish and greedy; a human knowing of the Afterlife, that they should not understand the end of a life— that could be dangerous.

            Another curse nearly escaped Letuphoya's lips, but a Border Collie who had been hit by a truck opened her office door and limped through the doorway. Letuphoya had always had a love for dogs, and she didn't want to scare this one by retelling her mistake.

            However, despite her resolution not to think on the subject until later, the Collie had to bark the few times the voice in the back of her mind got a little too loud to ignore. She shuddered as the Collie departed down one of the Funnels and she glanced at a clock. There was another five hours to suffer through with her guilt.

            Letuphoya groaned and stomped back to her office, scaring several being in the waiting room who were beginning to wish they had never died in the first place.

            "Um... Ma'am?" asked the boy timidly. Katherine's face took on a confused expression as she let go of him and stared into his eyes.

            "You're not Sam," she whispered, then gave a forced laugh, putting her face into her hands. She took a deep breath and looked up, smiling in a way that took very little muscle effort. "I'm sorry." She swallowed and got shakily to her feet.

            "It's okay," the boy said casually. "You're the one... uh... Kate Barlow, right?"

            "Yes," said Katherine. "I am."

            "Well, you're a pretty good actress," said he, smiling a bit.

            She had suddenly became very interested in smoothing the wrinkles out of her skirt and looked up at this. "I suppose."

            "You're not an actress?"

            "No, I'm a schoolteacher."

            "You know, that's getting kind of annoying."

            "What is?" asked Katherine, before she understood what was being said. "You don't believe me? Because, young man, I can assure you that I am being perfectly truthful."

            "Of course you are. And I'm the queen of England."

            Katherine raised an eyebrow at this, but continued to protest, "Please, you must believe me!"

            "If I believe you," said the boy. "You're not going to laugh at me, call me an idiot, and make a fool of me?"

            "Not at all."

            "Okay. Sure. I believe you. Life's gotten pretty boring, anyway."


	4. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer**: Don't own the characters, except for Jack, and I don't own the quote from _Holes_, because it is a quote from _Holes_, meaning I have quoted from _Holes_.

**Thanks Yous**: Thanks to Celestra, GriffinFox, siriusblack101, Nosilla, and CL Curtis for your wonderful reviews!

Author's Note: If I screwed up on the quote from _Holes_ in this chapter, I blame my friend, who still has it for the novel study that never ends. I'm going by memory, which is never good, especially with me.

~*~

Chapter Three 

The boy Katherine had earlier assumed to be Sam was actually named Jack Handler. She quickly apologized for calling him Sam, but he assured her that it was no big deal.

            "It's not that bad," he said, shrugging. "You could've thought I was Trout. C'mon." He got up and headed towards the exit, but Katherine hesitated before rushing up to him.

            "How do you know about Trout?"

            "Oh." It was Jack's turn to stop. Katherine paused in mid-step, then brought her foot back to the ground.

            "Well," said Jack, taking a deep breath. "You're a fictional character. At least, in this world you are."

            Kate became aware of her mouth hanging slightly open too late. She regained control of her jaw as quickly as possible and closed her mouth.

            "I'm— what?" She forced a laugh. "Did I— Are you pulling my leg?"

            He shook his head.

            "But, surely, you must be joking!" she cried, incredulous. 

Again, Jack shook his head. "Nope. Uh... Okay, let's go." He quickened his pace and Katherine could not do anything but follow, trying to get a sane answer out of him, but no sane answer was to be had.

            When, a few minutes later, Jack finally came to a halt and pulled a key out of his pocket, Katherine was too shocked to speak. This world, if that's what it really was, was stranger than her wildest dreams! She stood, awestruck, staring at _something_ zooming down the road, some sort of pulsing racket coming out of it that was so loud, she felt as though the ground was shaking.

            "Hey!"

            She finally turned around, dragged out of her reverie, and saw Jack motioning for her to come inside. He then silently removed his shoes and crept through the now opened door. Katherine followed him, pressing herself against the wall in an attempt to imitate him. They slunk into room without making a sound.

            "Okay," said Jack, taking a deep breath and plopping down on the floor. He waved about the room, and Katherine took this as a cue to sit down. She chose a black-and-white spotted chair that was built in the most odd way, had wheels, and was placed in front of some sort of box. She was going to ask what it was, but Jack cut her off.

            "Wait right here."

            He got up and left her in the room with the strange box. Katherine then observed another box with a lot of buttons on it, and a rectangle with several small squares on it. Some boxes had the letters of the alphabet written on them (_not in the proper order_, Katherine noted.), some had numbers with symbols above them, some just had symbols, some had words, and four had arrows. One box was longer than the rest, and it was completely blank. With a few glances at the door, Katherine touched the box with the letter 'P' on it, and was surprised to find it go down when her finger tapped on it. Then, when she lifted her finger, it sprang back up. Carefully and slowly, Katherine spelled out her name by pressing the boxes. When she had finished, she looked to the large boxes for some sign of recognition. She then typed out 'Hello', but nothing happened. The glass in the middle of the squarer box remained dark.

            "Hey," said a voice, causing Katherine to jump. She blushed and turned around to see Jack. To keep from distracting herself, she picked up the chair and turned it towards him, and he laughed.

            "Here," he said, putting the chair back the way it had been. Then, he put his hand on the seat and turned it towards him. Katherine was again surprised, but did not say anything. She sat down and looked to Jack, who was holding up a small book.

            "You," he pointed to the book's cover. "Are from this book. Look." He opened it, flipped through the pages. When she stopped, he put his finger on a paragraph. "Read this."

            Katherine took the book from him and read from where his finger had been.

_            "Oh, Sam," she sobbed. "My heart is breaking_._"_

_            "I can fix that," said Sam_.__

_            She turned to him. He took hold of both her hands, and kissed her_.__

_            Because of the rain, no one was outside. Even if they had been, Miss Katherine and Sam wouldn't have noticed. They were too lost in their own world_.__

_            However, at that moment, Hattie Parker stepped out of the general store. She pointed a quivering finger in their direction_.__

_            "God will punish you," she whispered_.

            Katherine's lip trembled, and she blinked back tears.

            "That's how they found out," she said to no one in particular. She sniffed and turned to Jack.

            "Sorry," he smiled weakly. "But, um, anyways, that's what I mean. You're fictitious. And, well, you're in the wrong century."

            "I don't know how it happened," said Katherine, shaking her head. "I mean, I should be back in there—" She indicated the book. "Not here."

            "Well, if it makes you feel better, you've got a happy ending... er... sorta." Jack turned the pages, trying to find the scene where Kissin' Kate Barlow died, but it wasn't there. The pages beyond the end of the next chapter, when Sam died, were all blank.

            Jack had noticed this, too. "What's going on?"

            "What's going on?" asked a rather distraught Magnet. He was the first to speak, the rest were staring out at the lake that was, for once, actually a lake. In fact, there was now a town. Yes, it was a miracle, but a strange one.

            "Dunno," said most of the other campers at some point or another.

            "One of those fanfiction authors, probably," suggested the Warden, who was acting oddly polite.

            "I bet I know who it was," said X-Ray, rolling his eyes. "Beena-Pani."

            "Doesn't she have anything better to do? I mean, she's already gone and made Zig question his own sexuality!" Armpit jerked his thumb at Zigzag, who was wondering if he should be turning to a puddle of mush because Armpit had noticed him. "Couldn't she just have another girl come here like normal people?"

            "Or at least bug Elya and Madame Zeroni," Stanley yawned, rubbing sleep from his eyes.

            "Yeah," chorused several unnamed girls, most of whom had started attempting to snog Squid, Zero, Zigzag, or Magnet. Just a few were pecking Stanley on the cheek, and only one had her arms around X-Ray. Armpit was the only one capable of chasing off said females. D Tent (excluding Armpit, of course) had grown accustomed to these girls, and didn't even try to shake them off anymore. The boys from other tents, had also become used to them, and did not mind being ignored, rejected, or made into evil rapists. However, the females had stopped in the middle of their make-out attempts today, on noticing the now worthy-of-being-called-a-lake lake.

            "Maybe Louis Sachar's considering a rewrite," said the Warden, sick of talking about fanfiction authors. "You know, one where everything is happy."

            Everyone burst out laughing. _Holes_, happy? That would happen as soon as pigs learned to fly (well, naturally, anyway), which would probably never happen.

            "Well," said a random unnamed member of C Tent. "Maybe we should hold some sort of _Holes_ character meeting thing."

            Such meetings had been held in the past, but not often. However, even the random, unnamed members of C Tent had their say and, seeing as that was what everyone else was thinking, they listened to the kid.

            A few minutes later, two random unnamed member of some random unnamed tent, which had been created because there was no longer any room for more girls in D Tent, returned with two very different reports.

            The first random unnamed member of the random unnamed tent had brought with him Elya Yelnats, Myra Menke, Boris Menke, Igor Barkov, and Madame Zeroni. The second random unnamed member of the random unnamed tent came cringing with Trout Walker, Hattie Parker, Linda Miller, and Dr Hawthorne.

            "Um," said the second random unnamed camper nervously. "Kate and Sam kinda... Are gone."

            "Excuse me?" The Warden put her hands on her hips and tilted her head. "What do you mean, 'they're gone'?"

            "Well, you see, they're not there..."

            "I know what it means! Why aren't they there?"

            "Ma'am," said Trout Walker, doing something good for once in his miserable life and saving the random unnamed camper from the Warden. "Right after we killed Sam, Katherine just disappeared."

            "Excuse me?"

            "Definitely not a fanfiction author," muttered Squid to X-Ray. "They love Sam and Kate."

            "Something's wrong." X-Ray had stated the obvious.


	5. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer**: Okay, don't own much here, people. Only Jack. That's it. Chrysti is a real person, who very kindly allowed me to write her in, and happens to be a fanfiction author. Her penname is C.L. Curtis and she has written a _wonderful_ _Holes_ fic, which I command you to take a look at now.

Think that's a long enough disclaimer?

**Thank Yous**: CoolGirlEmily, Nosilla, GriffinFox, Celestra, and La Bella Mafia. Double thanks to C.L. Curtis for letting me use her as a weapon of mass destruction on poor Kate and Sam, for getting me to update, and for giving me a wonderful review that did _not_ help my ego problem.

Author's Note: Happy Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanza, Yule, Eid, Diwali, and any other celebration you may have the pleasure of celebrating to all of you wonderful readers, whether or not you choose to review, who mean more to me than all the chai in India! (Which is saying something, since I had two cups this morning and am still craving more)

**Chapter 4**

Katherine ran through the plan again in her head. She had to stay in a closet until she heard a buzzing sound, which meant Jack's mother had gone to work, which was going to be for an hour after Jack left for school. She wasn't supposed to answer the door, especially in the afternoon, because that was when school let out and the obsessed _Holes_ fanatic who lived next door came home.

            "What's wrong with that?" Katherine asked Jack as he ran around his room, trying to locate a pencil.

            "She's obsessed, as I said, so she's going to have a fit when or if she sees you," he explained, stuffing the pencil (which had been on his bedside table) into his pocket. "And anyone else will wonder who the heck you are."

            "Oh."

            "Sorry," said Jack, adjusting his bag on his shoulders. "About the closet. But I really don't know where else you can stay, until my mum and dad leave for work." He checked the alarm clock again; making sure it would go off at the right time, so Kate could get out of his closet as soon as possible.

            "Okay," said Katherine, trying to figure out a position she could stay in for an hour without being in too much pain.

            Jack stepped out the door, then turned around and popped his head back in. "After I come back, we'll get you some clothes and stuff like that."

            "All right."

            She sighed and put a hand on her hip, tilting her head as she looked at the closet. Then, with another sigh, she opened the door and crouched down into the corner. A mass of clothes became a chair, and she leaned up against the wall, trying not to think how much the heap of clothes needed to be laundered.

            "I'm going to be away for a while," explained a distraught Letuphoya as she neatly folded a sari and packed it into her suitcase. Her little sister, Vitanna, was less than thrilled at the prospect of being both the goddess of death _and_ reincarnation. Her only motivation was she was going to be paid and maybe Letuphoya would quit bragging about having a job for once if she helped her out this once.

            "How long is a while?" Vitanna asked, leaning against the wall of her sister's office.

            "However long it takes for me to fix this mess—"

            "That you made," smirked Vitanna. When she saw Letuphoya's murderous look, she quickly added, "Nobody's perfect."

            "If you tell anyone or anything, I'll..."

            "What?"

            "I'll do something."

            "Oooh," the younger laughed. "I'm scared."

            Letuphoya straightened up and at her. "You should be," she said quietly, hoping to scare her sister, but it was in vain. Vitanna stifled a giggle, and tried to keep a straight face.

            "If anyone asks where I am," Letuphoya said over her shoulder as she walked towards the same door Mary Lou had gone through. "Tell them I'm feeling sick and you're doing this out of the goodness of your heart."

            "Honey, I'll tell them that," said Vitanna. "But when a cynical teenager says that, people get suspicious."

            Letuphoya was going to think of a witty comeback, but it dawned on her that what her sister said was true.

            _I'm definitely going to get fired_, she thought, closing her eyes.

            Her first thought upon coming to the world that you and I live in was definitely worthy of a PG-13 rating, at the very least.

            Jack had never felt so bored in his life. The girl who sat beside him and lived next door, Chrysti, was flinging eraser bits at random students, and was his only source of entertainment. When one has a fictional character sitting in their closet at home, they do not find a review of exponents very interesting at all. He fought back the urge to yawn, which would cause his teacher to ask him to do a problem to make sure he was paying attention.

            "Jack!" shouted Mrs Steele, bringing him out of his thoughts. Jack blanched. He must have let a yawn escape.

            "Yes, ma'am?" he asked, adding the 'ma'am' to prove his innocence. A few people giggled at it, but Mrs Steele didn't seem to notice.

            "Could you help Georgia?"

            Jack let out his breath as quietly as possible. So it had been another student not paying attention. He looked at the board, where _5to the exponent 3_ was written on the board. Georgia, one of the girls who never paid any attention and had befriended the smart kids in the class in an attempt to improve her grades without working, had written _5to the exponent 3 __= 15_.

            "Yes, ma'am." He got up, and wrote _5to the exponent 3= 5x5x5= 125_.

            "Perhaps you should make an effort to be mentally present in your classes," said Mrs Steele. Jack, who had been walking back to his seat, froze and felt his cheeks getting hot. He turned around and opened his mouth to protest, but found Mrs Steele had been talking to Georgia.

            Jack had to admit he was a bit jumpy when he looked down at his t-shirt just to make sure it didn't say 'Katherine Barlow is hiding at my house'

A sari is an Indian dress. It consists of the sari, a long piece of material that is wrapped around the woman who is wearing it, a petticoat, and a small blouse that does not cover the stomach. The outfit Letuphoya was wearing in the first chapter was actually called _salwar khamees_. Sorry for the mistake.


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer**: Sam, Kate, and D Tent are all figments of Louis Sachar's imagination, not mine. The Philosopher's Stone is actually from ancient mythology, but J K Rowling was the one who wrote a book about it, so it belongs to her. Haha! Try to sue me now!

**Thank yous**: C.L. Curtis, Nosilla, Celestra, siriusblack101, and Griffin Fox! Your reviews mean more to me than a huge pile of chocolate! Special thanks to C.L. Curtis, for threatening/motivating me and giving me completely random ideas. And to Celestra, for reviewing my stories from the very beginning, especially when they stank like a week-old omelette with maggot-infested beef on the side... I think I'm going to be sick now.

**Chapter Five**

Letuphoya was getting a few strange looks, but she ignored them. If this worked out, she'd be seeing all these people sometime again and then she could reincarnate them as cockroaches if they gave her a look like that.

            "Okay, here's the plan," she muttered to herself. "Get Kate and Sam, tell them they've got to go back to the Afterlife. Save the book, the world, and your job." She smiled to herself. "Excellent. Now, where to start...?" She trailed off, looking around in all directions. Sighing, she decided on going straight. This was going to be harder than she had thought.

            "Meeting in A Tent!" shouted Mr Pendanski, pointing to the ever-overlooked tent. With a grimace, Squid carefully peeled one girl's hand off his arm as she gazed out at green-blue water, sighing 'How romantic' over and over, like a broken record. She didn't notice his absence; on the contrary, she continued to be mesmerized by the lake as a gentle breeze toyed with her sandy-hued hair.

            Although Squid attempted to slip silently past the different gatherings of girls, he found it impossible to get to A Tent's flap without several orange jumpsuit-clad lasses hanging off any limb they could take hold of.

            "I'm sorry Squid," said Mr Pendanski, though his features betrayed his speech. "There's no room for you—" he nodded at the troublesome females. "— And, several of the others, such as Elya and Mr Walker, have never been exposed to such large numbers of original characters. We don't know what their reaction could be. We aren't even sure _they—_" again, he inclined his head towards the girls, as if afraid to use the term 'Mary Sues' (Squid didn't blame him; he had seen one of them, Citronella, nearly kill someone for asking about her name, which was why she had been sent to Camp Green Lake in the first place.). "Might do. You'll have to wait outside."

            "What? What about Magnet and Zigzag and Zero?"

            "Well, we managed to fend off Zero's, er, fan club by showing them some slash. After all, there's more Stanley/Zero than any other pairing... And there weren't many of them, anyway."

            "All right." Squid envied Zero. You could count the girls attacking _him_ on your fingers and toes, at least.

            "And Magnet said something to _his_ fan club in Spanish, and that seemed to work well."

            Squid looked over his shoulder at a group of a bit more than thirty girls bawling, each of them looking like raccoons because of the masses of mascara, eyeliner, and eye shadow they all— somehow— found time to apply every morning. The huge black smudges somehow looked attractive, though on any normal girl it would look like the dark circles were caused by a lack of sleep.

            "What about Zigzag?" asked Squid. Mr Pendanski looked thoughtful, then looked over his shoulder at Zigzag.

            Looking around Mr Pendanski for his tent mate, Squid couldn't help but smirk a bit. Yelping something about Mary Sues working for the government, the frizzy-haired boy was barely visible under the layers of females who were fighting over him. It wasn't often that Squid got to see someone in that position, unless he had a mirror handy. On top of that, Zigzag's paranoia attracted only the most jumpy, chocolate-loving nutcases who seemed much better suited for Twitch, because, it seemed to Squid, they weren't crazy, only hyperactive. Zigzag handled them terribly (_Just like anyone else_, Squid reprimanded himself.), and this added to the humour of seeing him clobbered by the boy-crazy teens.

            "Actually, you're right." Squid looked up at Mr Pendanski, trying to remember what he had asked him. "Ricky!"

            Zigzag's pushed through the swarm and made his way up to D Tent's counsellor, breathing heavily and clasping his hand over his hair. "Yeah, Mom?"

            "I'm afraid you'll have to leave."

            "What?"

            "Hey, Ziggy, it's okay," offered Squid. "I have to, too."

            This did not make Zigzag any happier, but he kept his mouth shut and accepted his fate.

            He sat down beside Squid on the brand-new sandy shore, staring out at the lake. Squid removed his shoes and socks and started squeezing the wet sand between his toes, feeling the water lap against his feet. He smiled, leaned back on his elbows. Sighing, he closed his eyes and felt the sun on him, for once just comforting warmth and not maddening heat.

            Not a good idea.

            Hearing a high-pitched scream and a large splash, Squid opened his eyes. Zigzag had plunged into the lake, obviously terrified.

            "Zig! Zig, come back!"

            Squid looked around, and soon, he too was immersed in water. He paddled after Zigzag, fleeing the canoe that was slowly drawing closer to shore.

            It seemed that the brand-new supposed-to-be-non-existent lake was no barrier for the fanfiction authors. Another girl was arriving already.

            The water was flooding his mouth and nose, so even though he tried to call for help, Squid's cries were inaudible. A terrible realization came over Squid and he stopped kicking, giving in to the inevitable.

            He had never learned to swim.

            The sound of rushing water filled his ears and the world got a brownish tint to it as he sank beneath the water. He couldn't remember anything. He couldn't think of anything. All he could do was looking around and take in the beauty of this unknown place.

            And then it hit him. He couldn't breathe. Again, he was forced to remember that he couldn't swim, that he was going to drown in a lake that was supposed to have dried up over a century ago.

            Squid doubted the new girl was worse than this.

            As Dr Reynolds got in her car and drove away, Sam felt as though all hope was lost. No one would believe he was who he was, and no one believed that Katherine was real. He would never find her now.

            He walked down the street, wondering what he could do. It seemed he didn't have any choices. He would just have to see where destiny, or whatever forces were at work, took him.

            Still in his reverie, Sam looked up to see just where destiny had taken him. It was a large, or rather long, building with many windows. There was a yard surrounding it and a fence around that. Young children were scattered about the yard, playing games and talking to each other. Again, Sam was surprised by the variety of skin tones, but the shock was less than when he had seen the young couple on the street.

            He looked down and saw a young girl looking at him. Her eyes were brown, but they had a bit of green in them. Her face had a mature look about it, though she was obviously no more than six. Her hair was tied into two braids on either side of her head.

            "Hello," he said, growing uneasy. She still stared at him.

            "I can't talk to strangers."

            He tilted his head to the side, hardly hearing her comment as he tried to figure out why she was looking at him so intently.

            "Oh. Well, I'll go now," he told her, grateful for a reason to leave. There was something eerie about her.

            "Do you know where my Aunty is? Her name is Abigail Reynolds," she said.

            Sam quirked an eyebrow at the young girl. "I know her, but I don't know where she is right now. I thought she had to pick you up." It wasn't completely a lie. They had had a fairly long conversation, though it consisted of nothing more than Ms Reynolds confirming his insanity.

            "Oh. Who are you looking for?"

            Sam found himself staring back at her. "How do you know I'm looking for someone?"

            "Aunt Abby says we're all looking for someone. Not everybody knows it, but we all need someone else, and we're always looking for them, even if we don't realize it. Do you know who you're looking for?"

            He almost laughed. "Yes, I do."

            "Who?" she asked, looking up at him innocently.

            "Her name is Katherine Barlow." Remembering what Dr Reynolds had called her he added, "Kissin' Kate Barlow."

            The young girl's eyes grew wide. "You're Sam the onion man?" she whispered.

            "Y-yes," he choked out, amazed this child knew him.

            "How'd you get out of the book?"

            "What book?"

            "My sister reads it all the time," she said. "It's her favourite. It's called _Holes_."

            "Oh." Sam didn't ask her to explain it.

            "So, how'd you get out?"

            "I—" Sam considered telling her the entire story of Letuphoya and the purple afterlife, but he barely understood it himself, so he simply said, "I don't know, but I'm here. And I need to find Katherine."

            "I'll help you!" The little girl smiled widely. "My name's Penelope, but everybody calls me Penny, because it's easier to say."

            "And I'm Sam," he said, and Penny laughed.

            "I knew that!"

            Another voice joined the conversation.

            "What are you doing here?" asked Abigail Reynolds, pulling Penny away from the fence. "If I see you again, I'll call the police."

            "All right." Sam threw up his hands and backed away slowly, but he caught Penny waving at him as she was pulled into her aunt's car.

            He hoped that he would never have to encounter the woman again, though her niece's belief in his story had given him momentary hope.

            But, as it was, luck was not on Sam's side.


	7. Chapter 6

**BIG thank yous and an author's note**: to everybody who reviewed. You have every right to murder me, but, luckily, you didn't. I meant to upload this on Valentine's Day, but... sighs and hangs head There were boy problems. Yucky. Anyway, I've been thinking, and I really have to rewrite some of this. Oh, and thanks to C.L. Curtis who got me feeling guilty enough to get off my butt and update by reviewing a few days ago. I'll just summarize the changes in the story:

**Prologue-** Nothing's changed here.

**Chapter One-** Ditto.

**Chapter Two-** Ah, here we are. The whole 'universe will implode' thing was much too vague for my liking. I probably had a technical explanation, but never bothered to write it down. Anyway, I've been reading _The Wish List_ by Eoin Colfer, and you may be able to spot the inspiration. Letuphoya didn't seem to me like the type who would settle for a three-word explanation, which I'm beginning to think was only an exaggeration.

**Chapter Three-** Nada.

**Chapter Four-** Ugh. I hate that one character, Abigail Reynolds. She's so awfully written. Had to get rid of her, which shortened the chapter quite a bit.

**Chapter Five**- This is the worst. Was in a very bad mood while writing it, I think. Changed Penny so she's a more believable five-year-old.

Chapter Six 

            Squid, despite his panic and terror, found his eyes slowly closing of their own will. His last little breath escaped into the water, bubbling up to the surface...

            A light at the end of the tunnel. That's what he saw now, and, like a bug, felt himself being drawn towards it, just as helpless as he had been in the water. Music filled his ears, and he vaguely wondered if it was Enya, but then realised he was dead, and that light was heaven, and the music must be angels or something. He blinked, confused, sure he must have taken a wrong turn. Heaven? That couldn't be right, he was sure of it. When in his life had he been really, truthfully good, unless there was something in it for him?

            A sharp pain in his gut tugged him forcefully from his thoughts, and he looked back to where he was. Zig seemed to have reached the shore again, and Zig was leaning over him, an arm on each of his sides. It appeared that the blonde boy was attempting to perform CPR.

            There was another sharp pain, and this time he was pulled closer to the ground, and closed his eyes as he felt his essence enter his physical entity.

            Immediately, Squid sat up, coughing up water. Zigzag's eyes were wider than usual and his paranoid expression slowly melted into a smile.

            "Squidly!" he exclaimed, pulling him into a tight hug. This got the smaller, brown-haired boy to cough up water again, so Zigzag let go and allowed him to lie down again.

            "Thanks, Zig," said Squid, feeling as though his throat was burning. He had forgotten what it was like to have water go up your nose. "You saved my life."

            "Well, that's what I do," Zigzag smiled. "Fight off your Mary Sues and save you from drowning."

            "You seem very out of character, Zig. You suffer from acute paranoia, and you're not flipping out or anything."

            "Must be them. Always get out of character when they're around." It was then that Squid noticed the Mary Sues standing around him, peering at him with concern. A few stood back, rolling their eyes: the "bad girls" Squid was always paired up with.

            "Just lie down again and start coughing," muttered Zig, trying not to move his lips.

            Obediently, Squid did as his friend said, and soon Zigzag was shouting frantically,

            "Call a doctor, quick! He's dying!"

            About twenty of them ran off in different directions, leaving two "bad girls" behind.

            "Why should I care if Squid is dying? I don't even like him," one said, a cynical edge in her voice.

            "Which means that you're secretly head over heels for him," Zigzag pointed out.

            "You just ruined the story! I'm gonna go sulk now." And with that, she stalked off.

            The remaining girl just stared at Zigzag and Squid, who decided to sit up and stare right back.

             "You're not getting rid of me," she said proudly.

            "I disapprove of drugs, smoking, alcohol, anything illegal, rabbits and kittens are my favourite animals, I love pink, I watch soap operas, I know the definition of 'serendipity', I don't want to bump up the rating of this fic with you, I cried when I saw _Yentl_, and _My Fair Lady_ is my favourite musical," Squid recited without hesitation.

            "Huh?" The girl stood there with a priceless expression on her face.

            "_I have often walked down this street before_

_But the pavement always stayed beneath my feet before_

_All at once am I_

_Several stories high_

_Knowing I'm on the street where you live_," sang Squid, rather loudly. An eyebrow raised, Zigzag made a spluttering sound that suggested Squid should explain.

            "You can learn so much from those crossovers and parodies," he said simply, smiling as the Mary Sue turned tail and fled.

            Jack took a deep breath and strode across the room. Suddenly feeling very small and insignificant, he tapped on the shoulder of the girl standing in front of him.

            "Hi, Sarah," he said with as much confidence as he could muster, clearing his throat. "Um, look, my mom's going out tonight and I promised to meet someone, so would you mind taking care of Danny and Kayla?" Sarah often babysat Jack's younger twin siblings, and he hoped she wouldn't say no. He was going to help out Kate tonight, since his mother was going to be out. She wasn't exactly his friend, seeing as he rarely spoke to her, but he was sure she didn't despise him. Sarah was a nice enough girl, who always had a smile on her face that made her otherwise plain features look brighter and more glamorous. Sine second grade, Jack had had a huge crush on her, and, because of the lack of conversation between them, he felt it wasn't completely obvious. It couldn't be, if he could count the number of times he'd spoken to her on one hand, right?

            A little sigh escaped Sarah's lips, and her smile fell a bit, though it was still there.

            "Sorry, dear, my aunt's over and I've got to pick Penny up from school tonight. You could bring the twins to my place, though, and I'll watch them there," she suggested. That was another thing about her; she took great delight in calling people 'dear', as if she was speaking to someone half her age. Probably why she was a babysitter, although one would think the mocking tone in her voice would be absent if she was addressing a toddler.

            "All right, we'll be over at 4:30, okay?"

            "Sure. You should pick them up by 9:00 at the latest."

            Her smile widened for a moment, then she turned around and continued her previous discussion.

            That afternoon, when Sarah met her younger sister by the gate leading to Alderdale Primary School, Penny was already looking for her, and Sarah knew she was late. However, the excited look on her face meant she wasn't all that upset, so there was no reason to be worried that she would burst into tears or throw a fit.

            "Guess who I saw?" Penny chirped.

            "Who?" asked Sarah, with exaggerated expressions.

            "Sam!" Penny giggled at this, and clapped her hands. "Sam the onion man!"

            "Are you sure?" Sarah feigned shock.

            A quick nod was Penny's only response.

            "I thought I would see him today..." she said after a minute. She looked around, as if suspecting the fictional character to pop out of the ground. Penny sighed. "Oh, well."

            They were silent for a few more minutes before Penny giggled again. Sarah looked at her as she clapped her hands and pointed across the street. "Sam!" she cried, and the man across the street looked up. Oddly enough, Sarah thought he could pass for Sam the onion man.

            "Sam, this is my sister!" Penny was already tugging at Sarah's hand as she spoke, laughing out loud. "Come over here!" And she clapped her hands again.

            Sarah had a feeling this would be rather interesting.

            "Jack!" she cried as she opened the door at 4:32 p.m. to see her classmate with his twin siblings. "Come on in," she said to Daniel and Kayla, who didn't need to be asked in the first place. They had already kicked off their shoes and now were running down the hall.

            "Guess what happened this afternoon?" she whispered conspiratorially when the twins were out of earshot. She then relayed the story of what had happened while she and Penny had been walking home. "I know it sounds crazy," she finished.

            "N-no. It doesn't," Jack replied, eyes wide. He smiled a little, then said, "Um, look, I'll talk to you later. I've got to do some homework."

            Wait until Katherine heard about this.


End file.
